Loving Blindly
by amehanaa
Summary: She was always sitting at the same time, same train, and same seat with a book in her hands.


She was always sitting at the same time, same train, and same seat with a book in her hands.

I didn't know what her hands were like without holding a book. Her fingers constantly gripped the sides of her book with so much strength, sometimes I'd see her hands rattle.

Each time she flipped a page, she'd become so absorbed into the words; desperately wanting more. But one day, her hands never tried to turn to the next page.

Her name was Lucy Heartfilia. I had seen that she was a quiet person and read as much as she possibly could. She would always enter the library after school and head straight to the train station afterwards.

She had sparkling blonde hair that simmered along with the sun when we rode back home from school. My best friend and enemy at some points, Gray Fullbuster, claimed that she preferred books over people.

As for me, Natsu Dragneel, observed Lucy everyday on the train. Watching her stare at the books she read fascinated me. Her eyes moved faster than the speed of light. If I had the choice, I would watch her forever.

I never had the courage to talk to her. I tried many times but each time my eyes landed on her delicate brown orbs, I backed away and allowed her to enjoy her reading.

"We are now arriving," a robotic voice informed throughout the intercom on a dull morning.

I watched as Lucy blinked at the intercom for a few moments. She grabbed one of the metal poles and pulled herself up. Once the train came to a full stop, she hastily stuffed the book into her schoolbag and began to exit the train.

"Your book," I murmured as it dipped to the ground. I expected Lucy to notice but she didn't.

"Your book," I repeated with a louder voice. When she didn't turn around, I bent down to pick it up and rushed off the train to catch up with her.

"Lucy, you dropped your book!" I called out.

This was the first time I had said her name out loud.

A blonde head whipped around and searched for the person who called her name out.

"Here," I walked towards her and handed her the book.

She didn't take the book. She studied me silently, taking note of the ridiculous color of my hair, then scowled.

"You're too loud," she mumbled.

"Sorry, this is how I am," I grinned.

"How do you know my name?" she asked.

"We go to the same school," I replied, not surprised she didn't know who I was. "I'm Natsu. You dropped this," I shook the book slightly towards her.

"Oh," she took a glance at it. "I'll give it to you."

"But you were in the middle of—"

"It's fine," she began to wave goodbye. "I'm not going to read anymore, so I'll give it to you."

"Thanks!" I looked down at the maroon book with curiosity. Her bookmark was in the middle of the book. I wasn't much of a reader but I was surprisingly looking forward to reading what Lucy had just read.

"Bye, Natsu," she turned around and strode to the direction of our school. With another grin, I placed the book into my schoolbag and trailed behind her.

* * *

"Natsu, are you holding a book?" My long-haired friend, Erza Scarlet, asked me with disbelief when she entered our classroom.

"And you're _reading_ it?" Gray chimed in, slamming a hand on his desk.

"Shut up," I frowned at them. "I like to read sometimes!"

"Yeah, food menus," Gray scoffed.

I ignored my two friends by turning away. Because of Lucy, I had started to enjoy reading. I was slowly stepping into the world Lucy was in love with.

When the teacher took brief breaks from lecturing, I read a few more words until they continued to talk. I didn't think four lettered words could put such scenes inside my head. Once class ended, I closed the book with a sigh.

"Do you have to read out loud?" Gray complained while we walked to our next class.

"If I don't, I'm going to fall asleep," I replied sheepishly.

"Why are you forcing yourself then?" Erza asked.

"No reason," I answered.

All I wanted was to get closer to Lucy.

* * *

"Lucy, I read the book!" I jogged up to her at the train station when school ended.

"Oh, you're from this morning, right?" she squinted, searching through her memories.

"Yeah, I'm Natsu," I reminded her with a smile.

"You read the whole book?" she stepped onto the train that had arrived. She strolled to her usual seat. I sat in front of her, just like always.

"No," I chuckled. "Only 20 pages. I'm reading it little by little."

She looked down at the floor with a bored expression. Seeing her hands empty was foreign to me.

"Would you mind if I talked to you?" I questioned.

"Yes," she gave me a smile. "I would."

I didn't object to it. I was just happy that I had finally had a conversation with Lucy.

She didn't wave or say goodbye when she exited. I didn't expect her to. Just like with the book, little by little I would try to get closer to her.

* * *

"Lucy, what does this mean?" I immediately asked when she got on the train after school the next day. I pointed to a line I didn't understand.

She glared at me and pinched the bridge of her nose, "You won't quit, will you?"

"I don't understand it," I reread the phrase again.

"If you don't get it, why don't you stop reading it?" she suggested.

"I want to know what happens to the main character," I admitted. "I support him." I shut the book gently to continue. "He keeps believing in himself, even though everyone is against him. People who don't give up on their dreams are awesome."

She seemed to give what I said some thought but her uninterested eyes never wavered, "You're really positive."

"Everyone says that," I smiled. To keep the conversation going, I took a look at her empty hands and let my curious mind speak. "Are you not going to read anymore? I haven't seen you go to the library in a while."

"You know a lot about me," she remarked.

"I pass by the library everyday with my friends after school and see you there," I informed.

"Oh, yeah," she smiled without revealing her teeth. "I always hear a loud group of people pass by everyday. It disturbs me a lot."

"Sorry," I muttered.

"So that was you," she said more to herself. Before I could apologize again she interrupted me. "You have a nice smile."

After saying that, she surged up from her seat and left the train. I was so shocked I hadn't heard her station being announced. I grinned and patiently waited for my stop to come.

I wanted to finish the book soon for Lucy.

* * *

Every morning when Lucy walked to her seat, I would greet her. I told her about what I had read the night before and my thoughts about it. I didn't know if she was listening or not, but it was alright.

"See you tomorrow, Lucy," I waved as she got off. She would wave her hand behind her slightly, as if she didn't want people to see. But a wave was a wave, after all.

While the days kept passing on, I noticed two people waiting for her. They were older-looking men and escorted Lucy out of the station. That was all I could see before the doors of the station slid closed.

I tried not to let it bother me. It wasn't any of my business.

"I'm getting close," I noted to myself, looking at where I was in the book. Lucy's bookmark was at least 20 pages away. I flipped to the page and realized the bookmark had a red gemstone connected to it.

"The bookmark?" Lucy asked the next day after school.

"It's really cool," I complimented.

"I'll give that to you, too," she replied.

"Really?" I said a little too loud. She sunk into her seat and closed her eyes.

"Too loud," she shook her head.

"But you're going to need this when you read books," I realized, taking out the bookmark.

"It's alright," she assured.

I lifted the gemstone into the air and the window that made Lucy's hair shine, made the red stone shine with it. It twinkled as the sun reflected from it.

"Your hair and your bookmark match," I got up from my seat across from her and went to her side. I sat beside her so she could see the stone with me.

"I can't tell," she averted her gaze to the floor.

"You have to look at it," I joked, nudging her shoulder with mine.

She sighed and peered at the gemstone. She didn't realize that she was slowly getting closer to my head to look at it. Her cheek was right beside mine.

"Bye," she pulled back and got off the train. I watched as she left the train, noticing the two people closer to the train than earlier days.

"I wish she couldn't hear the intercom either," I muttered and put the bookmark to the page where I was this time.

Hopefully, I would reach Lucy's page sometime soon.

* * *

"Natsu, now you're _studying_?" Gray slammed his hand on his desk again.

"Yep!" I nodded and went back to the sentence I was at.

"Is your dad making you do this?" Erza asked.

"No," I shook my head, not taking my eyes off the book. "Let me study now, okay?"

After reading more paragraphs about the subject, something in my mind clicked.

"I get it," I whispered in shock. "I need to tell Lucy."

Then on cue, a blonde head began to walk by my classroom. I knocked on the windows to get her attention. She didn't seem to hear the knocks so I knocked louder. Her legs stopped moving for a second. Then she continued to walk as if she never heard anything.

"Who is that?" Erza questioned.

"Nobody," I returned to my book and pretended to study.

I would just tell Lucy after school.

* * *

"This story is starting to get depressing," I spoke on the train later that day.

"Why don't you stop reading it?" she asked. "Like me."

"I knew you were still reading it," I confirmed to myself.

I went over to Lucy's side and turned to her.

"I'm giving this back to you," I stretched the book out to her.

"I don't want it," she declined with a grimace.

"I didn't really like books," I replied. "There was nothing interesting about them. But now each time I read a sentence a whole movie forms in my head. Even though I'm still working on it, I can form a movie when I'm studying. The more you do new things, the more you'll enjoy everything. Thank you for teaching me that."

"Here," I moved to the book to her hand.

I didn't know how much her hands had already given up, and the amount of courage she had to gather up to reach out her hand again.

"Ah," she yelped as the book slipped through her fingers when she reached for it. I started to bend down to pick it up for her but she stopped me by laying a hand on my shoulder.

"My eyes have forgotten how to do everything," she stated.

"What?" I looked up at her. She looked straight ahead at nothing.

"Have you noticed the two people waiting for me when I get off?" she asked.

I nodded.

"They help me walk home. I forgot what this illness is called. The only thing I know is there will be a day where I can't see anymore."

I didn't know how to respond. All those days I had talked to her she was slowly giving up while I was doing the exact opposite.

"Right now, I can tell things by their figures," she swallowed. "But I can't read books anymore."

She turned to me, "I can't even see your face."

"But you can see right now," my voice dropped down to a whisper. "A miracle might happen and you'll be able to—"

"That's what I used to think, too," she laughed. "But everyday, something I used to be able to see has turned into some blurry object."

She turned her head to look out at the window. The sun made her eyes light up.

"I'm okay like this. I have nice parents that gave me books. I had a nice life, so it's fine," she smiled at the sky.

It wasn't fine. No matter how many times I flip through the pages, I would never reach her.

The boy who believed in himself did not achieve his goal. He traveled months and months just to find what he needed and when he reached his destination, there was nothing there.

That was the page where Lucy's bookmark once laid.

* * *

After Lucy had told me her condition, she gradually stopped talking to me.

The conversations stopped midway, then after a few sentences, and then silence. Seeing Lucy's eyes dull away day by day was painful.

She began to drift away from me into a dark world neither of us wanted her to enter. She belonged in the reading world with me.

I was going to pull her back into the light. I didn't know how, but I was going to try my best to save the girl I had fallen in love with.

* * *

"Run faster," I encouraged myself as I sprinted to the train station. The corner of my schoolbag stabbed my shoulder with each step I took but I didn't pay attention. All I needed was to get to the train.

"Made it," I breathed out as I fell into my usual seat. I had Lucy's book in my hands and squeezed it while taking a few more breaths. I opened my eyes. Lucy wasn't in the seat across from me.

I scanned the area around me, forbidding myself to panic, and realized I entered the wrong cart. I picked myself up and shuffled to the next cart. The only person in the cart was Lucy.

"Natsu, I can't see you anymore," her trembling voice flooded through the cart. "Am I alone?"

"You're not alone," I whispered, dashing to her seat."I entered the wrong cart on accident."

"Where are you?" she seeked by looking everywhere. Her eyes landed on mine for a second then continued to search for me.

"I'm right here," I responded with a tight voice. I carefully touched her hand. She jumped at the sudden contact.

"Why can't I see you?" she asked as her hand lifted to my face. She placed a hand on my cheek.

Her somber eyes pierced into mine. Finally, Lucy had looked at me.

"All I see are colors," she stated. "Has your hair always been this bright?" I felt shaking fingers run through my hair.

"I think today is my last day," she whispered.

"Please don't give up," I begged.

"I can't see," her voice cracked as she spoke. Tears began to fall out, the life in her eyes ebbing away each second.

"It's going to be okay," I attempted to convince her, although I was trying to convince myself.

"When I lose my sight completely, can you do me a favor?" she asked softly.

"I'll do anything you want me to," I restrained myself from letting my voice waver.

"Read to me," her trembling fingers patted the area between us. When she found the book, she carelessly flipped through the pages. She scrutinized at the book.

"Read this," she pushed the book in my hands.

"Okay," I cleared my throat to read to Lucy. I wanted to plead her to turn to another page. She had turned to the most devastating part of the book.

"Thanks, Natsu," she smiled as her station was announced.

"Do you need help getting home?" I rised from my seat once the trained came to a stop.

"No, I got it. I'll see you tomorrow," she waved and exited the train. She walked as if she could see although only I could notice the slight stumbles in her steps.

Since I met Lucy, I always looked forward to seeing her. But having to see her lifeless eyes one more time was something I never wanted to look at again.

* * *

"Is that how it ends?" I exclaimed in frustration.

"There has to be an epilogue!" Lucy cried.

"There's only author notes," I flipped through the pages several times to make sure.

"Read the last page again!" she demanded.

"Okay," I smiled and reread the last few paragraphs.

Three weeks had passed since Lucy lost her sight. The miracle that we hoped for never happened.

She missed school for the first three days then returned as if nothing had happened. Her empty hands were no longer filled with air; they were wrapped around a thin white stick.

We talked to each other as if nothing had happened and she still had the ability to see. It was painful at first, hearing the clicks of the end of the pole hit the ground after each step. But once I started to read to Lucy all the pain subsided.

She was always sitting at the same time, same train, and same seat with a book in her hands. And I was blindly in love with her.

* * *

**How was it? Did it pluck you heart-strings a little? ;] **

**The title of this one-shot s a bit off in my opinion. I couldn't find a title in time so I quickly made one up! I am a terrible author. **

**Thank you all for the birthday wishes! ****You are all the sweetest people ever. (/∇＼*)**

**I hope all enjoyed my reversed birthday present! ~ Thank you all _so_ much.**


End file.
